Lessons of the Past Read online

  “Welcome to Calculus II for Business. I’m Professor Rodriguez,” he announced after he turned to face the class. His voice was deep, silky. “I’m going to pass out the course syllabus, which you’ll be able to find online as well, and then we’ll get started.”

  He passed out a stack of papers for each person in the first row to pass back and began speaking again. “I expect attendance in this class. It will be part of your final grade. I also expect you to take full advantage of the math lab if you need help. If you cannot find help there, my TA, Emily Lawrence, is available and holds a tutoring session. You can also find my office hours in the syllabus and my email.”

  He turned toward the desk and opened a textbook before droning on and on about change and area approximations. I was already lost and it was just the first class. Fuck my life. I had professor sexy ass trying to teach me about a subject I would never understand, all while I sat and drooled over him. His voice was so silky, it was hard to pay attention to his actual words. I wanted so badly to reach out and let my fingertips drag over his scruff. Thank goodness I wasn’t sitting up front.

  After an hour, he walked away from the whiteboard and dismissed the class. I shook my head, placed my notebook and textbook back in my bag, and began walking down the aisle toward his desk and the exit. He looked up as I walked by and our eyes locked for a moment. The beautiful blue of his eyes sent a shiver down my spine. My pulse quickened and my lips parted, lost in a lust-fueled trance. He was even sexier up close.

  The guy behind me gently knocked into me, breaking me from my stupor. I glanced around before looking at Professor Rodriguez again. He quirked an eyebrow and looked at me with amusement in those beautiful eyes.

  My face flushed with embarrassment and I quickly strode out of the room with my head down. I hoped none of the other students noticed my moment of humiliation. It was bad enough he had been amused by my attraction.

  I rushed out of the building, making a beeline for my next class located in the adjacent building. I was sure I looked like a crazy person, but I didn’t care. I needed away from my hot as sin professor.

  ***

  After my second class, I strode into the student union and ordered a turkey sandwich and Dr. Pepper before finding Lane in a corner booth. I walked toward him and placed my tray on his table.

  “Can I eat with you?” I asked as I sat down.

  He eyed my food and smirked. “Well, I guess so since you’re already getting comfortable.”

  “Whatever. You know you want me to sit with you. You love me.”

  “You’re right, I do. And I could use the company,” he said, his eyes turning sad.

  I smiled, and asked, “How were your classes this morning?”

  He shrugged. “Classes. You know. How was your calculus class?”

  “Ugh. I will never graduate. I have to pass this class for my major and I’m positive I won’t.”

  “Why? Who is your professor?”

  I took a bite of my sandwich. “Rodriguez,” I mumbled.

  “Rodriguez is great,” he replied. “You’ll pass. Just stop stressing.”

  We sat in silence for a few minutes, both lost in our own thoughts. Lane and I had been friends since junior high. He had been there during every single breakup, offering a shoulder to cry on, and I had always been there for him. He didn’t usually cry like I had, but I was there, ready to be a distraction, talking him into doing something stupid. We both understood the need for silence and that things didn’t always need to be said. Sometimes you just needed to be there for the other person without words. Which was what I was doing for Lane.

  “I confronted her,” he whispered.

  My head snapped up, and I was met with the saddest eyes. Tears sprang to my eyes as I rounded the booth and sat next to him, enveloping him in a hug. “I’m so sorry,” I said as my anger notched up. I wanted to go give Beth a piece of my mind.

  “It’s fine. I’m fine,” he replied as he gripped me harder.

  I didn’t say anything else until we pulled apart. “I’m here.”

  “I know, and I love you for it.” He tried to smile. “She said she was young and didn’t want to settle down.”

  “Why didn’t she say anything to you?”

  “She didn’t want to hurt me.” He shrugged. “That’s life, though. I’ll get over it.”

  “I’ll always be here.”

  “I know,” he replied before kissing my temple.

  Chapter 3

  For several hours Monday night, I tried deciphering my calculus homework, but failed miserably. Knowing I didn’t have much of a choice if I wanted to pass this class, I swung by the math lab after my early Tuesday class. And I left there even more confused. The jerk of a tutor kept looking at me like I was an idiot, obviously not understanding how anyone wouldn’t get the material. Well, there are those who tutor, and those who need tutoring, it’s kind of how the whole role works. And making me feel stupid for needing the tutoring had me quickly moving on to my final option: emailing the TA. She had been nice in the email and scheduled a time with me on Saturday morning during her shift in the math lab since I was in class during her normal tutoring session. If she couldn’t help me, I didn’t know what I was going to do. After my embarrassing display on Monday, there was no way in hell I was going to email my hot professor, or even swing by his office for help. Nope. Wasn’t going to happen.

  It was Friday morning, the sun barely shining in the distance as my legs came to a halt on the beach behind my apartment building. I stood with my hands on my hips, breathing in and out for a minute. Today will be better. The TA would help me—she had to—and I could quit stressing about math and worry about the courses that actually mattered to me.

  I bent down to touch my toes before starting my stretches, letting my body relax. Slowly, I raised my back and brought my arms over my head. I always felt weird stretching out on the beach, but I was mostly alone and wanted to avoid getting sand in my carpet if I could help it. Turning to the side, I came to an abrupt stop.

  Professor Hot Ass was jogging slowly toward me. I tried to force myself to look away, but he was shirtless, his dark skin and built body on full display. I suddenly felt very aroused, and a small ache formed in my sex, causing me to rub my thighs together.

  When he was a mere foot from me, his head turned up and he came to a standstill. I knew I looked like a fool for not moving out of his way, but I was frozen, struck stupid by the V of his hips drifting down below the shorts. Shorts I would love to tug lower with my teeth…

  “Sorry, I didn’t see you standing there,” he said, taking his earbuds out. “Oh, Ms. Wilson. I almost didn’t recognize you outside of the classroom.”

  I shook my head, cursing myself for being so obvious. “Um, Alex. I mean, call me Alex, Professor Rodriguez.”

  He nodded. “And you can call me Javier. Outside of the classroom, of course.” He smiled, and my breath caught.

  “O-okay,” I stuttered, cursing myself once more. I hated how stupid I sounded.

  He glanced out at the waves then turned his attention back to me. “Do you run often? I haven’t ever noticed you out before.”

  “Yeah.” His eyes bore into mine, and I realized I needed to say something more. “I try to run every morning. Helps get me ready and focused for my classes.”

  “Me, too,” he replied. “Well, I guess I’ll see you in a few hours for class?”

  Licking my dry lips, I said, “Yes. I don’t know for how much longer, though.”

  “What do you mean?” he questioned, his eye brows bunched.

  “You haven’t seen my homework I turned in on Wednesday?”

  “No. My TA grades the homework.”

  I nodded. “Ah, well, you’ll know what I mean later then. I have an appointment with your TA on Saturday, so we’ll see.”

  He pursed his lips for a moment. “When is your last class over?”

  “Four-thirty.”

  “Do you work?”

 
“Um…no,” I answered, confused by his questions. Did he not remember my embarrassing moment after Monday’s class?

  “My office hours end at five. Come by my office afterward and we’ll figure out the problem.”

  I nodded. “Okay. Are you sure? I’m supposed to meet with Emily on Saturday.”

  “I’m positive,” he answered. “With both of us helping you, surely you’ll be able to stay enrolled in the class.”

  “Thank you.”

  “No problem,” he replied as he started walking away. “See you in a few.”

  I stood there, rooted to the spot. What the hell had just happened?

  ***

  After showering and changing, I met up with Courtney and Lane at the coffee shop, as per usual.

  “I say we should party tomorrow night. We’re all single now, and we need to really live. We only have this year and next year before we have to be real adults,” Courtney announced as we sipped our coffee.

  “I am a real adult. I have a job and everything,” Lane replied, smirking.

  “Still…”

  “I’m game,” I chipped in.

  She beamed. “Yeah. It’ll be fun. Maybe we can meet up at your place at eight tomorrow?”

  I nodded. “Sure. Sounds good.”

  We both looked at Lane. He sighed and shrugged. “I guess.”

  Courtney placed her hand on his arm. “I promise, you’ll have fun.”

  I tipped my cup back and took a swig. “I can’t stay out too late, I have to study.”

  “Calculus?” Lane questioned.

  “Yeah. I fucking hate that class, but the professor is great to look at, so that’s a perk.”

  Lane rolled his eyes as Courtney asked, “Who’s the professor? I might need to take this class.”

  Chuckling, I said, “Rodriguez.”

  “Haven’t heard of him, but I definitely need to see this guy.”

  I finished off my drink. “With that, I’ve gotta go sit in his class for an hour. Y’all have fun.”

  I left the coffee shop and trekked toward the math building. I couldn’t help the flurry of emotions igniting within me. I knew we’d be getting our grades today and I absolutely did not want to face how poorly I had done, but at the same time, I was anxious to see him—bad grade or not. On the bright side, I wasn’t denying that I needed help, and I had been proactive in making sure I had it. On the other bright side, Professor Rodriguez seemed to overlook my embarrassing incident on Monday and he was offering to personally help. On the downside, I wasn’t sure how I felt about receiving his help. I feared I would make an ass of myself again.

  I was the first student to arrive and Professor Rodriguez was already at the desk in front of the room. With a heavy sigh, I looked away from him and walked toward my seat.

  “Ms. Wilson,” he called, and I turned toward him. “I have your homework.”

  I nodded and stepped toward him, trying not to actually look at him. I was afraid I’d gawk again.

  He cleared his throat. “Here you go. I think it’s wise to meet with Emily tomorrow.” He handed me the papers, and added, “We’ll go over this tonight, though. Hopefully it will give you time before you meet her to really understand and do better on your work next week.”

  “Thanks,” I replied. “Five still okay?”

  “Yes.” He didn’t say anything else and began looking over the stack of papers in front of him. I guessed that was my dismissal.

  I went to my seat and pulled my textbook and notebook out of my bag as the rest of the class filed in. The next hour was spent with Professor Rodriguez explaining accumulation functions. He explained sketching and interpreting the functions while answering questions from various students. I was relieved to know I wasn’t the only one who didn’t understand, but I was positive they still knew more than me.

  At the end of class, I gathered my things and darted out of the classroom without looking at him. He left me feeling confused. He had been so friendly this morning on the beach, and even friendly when he first spoke to me in the classroom, but the way he had dismissed me…rankled. It made me even more uneasy about meeting him for help in his office, alone. I knew I needed the help, but wasn’t sure I wanted him to know exactly how stupid I really was when it came to calculus.

  I spent the rest of the day attending my other two classes while sneaking in some study time and getting my caffeine fix. Inwardly sighing, I walked out of my last class and steeled myself as I made my way back to his office. It was do or die time.

  The door was closed, so I knocked, and waited. And waited. What the fuck? I checked my watch. I wasn’t early or late, but he definitely was. Footsteps snapped me out of my irritation and I looked up. Professor Rodriguez strode toward me with a bag in one hand, keys in the other. “Sorry,” he said as he unlocked the door. “I was starving, so I went to the deli in the union and got us some food.”

  “Oh,” I replied, shocked.

  Opening the door, he motioned for me to go inside before flipping the light on and closing the door. His office wasn’t small, but it wasn’t huge either. A wooden desk sat in front of a window overlooking the lawn, bookshelf to the side, and a table with two chairs to the other side.

  After placing the bag of food on the table, he pulled out two sub sandwiches and two bags of chips. “I hope roast beef is fine. I had them make it plain. The condiments are in the sack.”

  “That’s fine. You really didn’t need to do that.” I set my bag on a chair in front of his desk. “But I do appreciate it.”

  “No problem. I didn’t want to be an ass eating in front of you.” He gestured toward the bookshelf. “Could you grab two waters off the bottom shelf?”

  I nodded and grabbed the bottles before setting them on the long table where he had placed our food. He grabbed a textbook and sat down in one of the chairs, gesturing for me to sit next to him. “Let’s get started.”

  “Okay,” I replied, taking a seat before pulling out my notebook and textbook. He began devouring his sandwich and I couldn’t help but watch his mouth, noticing his full lips.

  I grabbed my sandwich and took a bite as he said, “I think we should just start from the beginning and go from there. If you don’t understand that, you won’t be able to pass the class.”

  He leaned in closer to me, his cologne wafting toward me. He smelled yummy. I took a deep breath and tried to focus on what he was explaining.

  “Do you understand how I got the answer?” he asked, his eyes locking with mine the same way they had after the first class. My skin tingled as we both stared at each other. I knew he was expecting an answer from me, but his eyes seemed to see right through me. As if he could see my answer already and my schoolgirl crush.

  “I…” I blinked and looked toward the paper he had just written on. “I think...I’m not sure.”

  “Try to solve this problem,” he said, pointing toward an example.

  Blowing out a deep breath, I went through the steps he had just shown me. I hated that he was watching me with those deep blue eyes, waiting for me to misstep.

  I finally finished and bit my lip as I placed the pencil on the desk. He looked over at me, a small smile playing on his lips. “You did it.”

  My eyes widened. “I did?”

  “Yeah. But I think you should do a couple more.”

  For the next hour, we ate our sandwiches and chips while I worked on approximating area under a curve problems. He was very kind and didn’t make me feel stupid at all, which was a relief. It made it easier to concentrate.

  “You can’t make it to Emily’s tutoring sessions?” he asked as I packed my things in my bag.

  “No. I have a class on Tuesday nights.”

  “Hmm.” He stroked the scruff on his chin. “I don’t normally do this, but I can meet you at this same time on Fridays. And of course you know where to find me each morning,” he said, smirking.

  “Thank you. I really appreciate it.”

  “You’re welcome.” He pulled a pi
ece of paper out of his desk and wrote something on it. “Take this. I put my cell number on the back. Just in case you’re stuck and really need help.”

  “Oh. Wow. Thank you,” I said as he rounded the desk and stood next to me.

  “I expect you’ll be spending the rest of the night going over everything we just worked on since you are meeting Emily in the morning. You’ll of course want to be prepared.”

  “I…uh,” I stammered, “I have plans. But I—”

  He barked out a laugh, cutting me off. “Relax, Alexandria. I was kidding.”

  “Oh.” I smiled a notch. “You can just call me Alex.”

  “Sorry. Your file says Alexandria. I’ll try to remember.” He reached up and brushed a piece of hair off my forehead, causing my breath to catch. Our eyes locked for a couple seconds. “But for the record, Alexandria is a beautiful name.”

  My pulse pounded and my sex clenched. “Thanks,” I whispered.

  He nodded and took a step back, but didn’t say anything else. I was being dismissed again. “Well, thank you. For the help,” I said before grabbing my bag and leaving his office. I glanced down at the card in my hand and smiled.

  Chapter 4

  My apartment felt too quiet, so I decided to drive to a small town near Beach Center where a little coffee shop, The Underground, was located. I didn’t feel like going to the one on campus, and this particular coffee shop added liquor to your java, which was the only reason I was drinking hot coffee in August.

  I sat down at a small table in the corner of the brick-walled shop located under a bookstore and placed my cup on the table. I took a small sip and let the warm liquid glide down my throat before digging out my health elective textbook. It had absolutely nothing to do with my major, but it was a fascinating class.

  While reading the horrible side effects of drinking too much tea, I heard someone clear their throat. I glanced up and my breath caught. Professor Rodriguez stood beside my table, blue eyes glittering in the low light and a small smile playing across his lips. His clothes were nothing like his custom-fitted work attire. He was wearing faded jeans that hung low on his hips and a gray t-shirt snug across his chest. He looked fucking edible.